What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i think i have herpe
just one?
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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