I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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