That's intense
everyone is single if you try hard enough
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
