I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
