i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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