this will be a night to untag.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize
