Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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