halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
