Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
