He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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