they need to just BURY HIM!
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
