That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
