wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
