i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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