I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
All I want is dick and wine.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
