I wish I only lived at night.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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