How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
