how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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