weddingsv make me drug and hornr
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
