Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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