Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
