all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
that is very illegal...i love you.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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