I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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