I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
