oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Verdict: uncircumcised.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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