it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
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