So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize