He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
a search helicopter?!
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
