let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
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