toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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