i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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