yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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