Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
