no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
