just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
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