9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
