ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize
