I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
