he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Randomize
