i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
