party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
