my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I need a beard to bite.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
