I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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