White coat. Heels.
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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