You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
