Already got asked if we're dating
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
