I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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