haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
