is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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