I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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