She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
