It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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