I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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